Staying Resilient During Tough Times

From time to time, we will include a blog posting from a Marino Center clinician on a topic of interest. The first issue is on the topic of resiliency in tough times authored by Deb Morrill MPH, RNCS, APN. Deb is a long time Marino Center clinician who focuses on women’s health.

As a seasoned health care provider, I have witnessed loss and crisis in many patients and most recently have experienced a tragic and sudden loss in my own family. Many individuals seem to show strength and resiliency during the most heartbreaking losses. A common armament of character, belief and coping strategies seem to be common among this group.
Resiliency is the ability or process by which people adapt successfully to life’s difficulties and challenges. It is the capacity to bounce back from a traumatic event or to thrive under seriously stressful situations

Three characteristics seem to be common among resilient people: a staunch acceptance of reality, a deep belief often buttressed by deeply held values, (that life is meaningful) and an uncanny ability to improvise.

This is often accompanied by a strong sense of community. The majority of individuals look to support from a formal or informal community. This is often a spiritual/faith community but may also be a bereavement group, AA meeting, work group, or chat room. I found myself reaching out to my co-workers and friends to organize a prayer wheel during my nephew’s catastrophic illness. I found much support and solace in the prayer, support, and community via email communication.

Spirituality and religious traditions may play a key role in providing solace and comfort. This outlet may offer shared belief systems, ritual and spiritual practices, community gatherings, support, care, and outreach. Communities seem to be a strong factor in resiliency. Altruistic behavior also may be beneficial for emotional health by releasing the hormone oxytocin which has sustained anti-stress effects. This means that providing service or doing good is actually good for you. You no longer need hesitate to ask a friend to pray or provide a favor, as the health effects will come back to that person. You can return the favor.

A regular meditation program can also strengthen resiliency. Herbert Benson’s studies show an association between relaxation response and positive neurochemical changes in the brain.
We will all need to test our resilience many times over in life.

Perhaps this is the time to reexamine our life beliefs, spirituality, and community involvement. It is not too late to develop a resilient self.


Special Note:
This article was written by Deb in memory of her nephew Eric J. Gaffney who died September 6, 2009 and his resilient, loving parents.